I need some advice guys. . .

[redline13]

I know I had just finished giving advice on a girl to someone, I forget who, but. . .as we all know, its hard to take one's own advice. So here is the deal.

My girlfriend and I have been together for a little over a month, and known eachother for a while now. But lately, it just seems more and more like she is growing less interested. Every time I offer to take her out or whatever, she always tells me "we'll see" or "I don't know, let me see what else I am doing" It seems that the motivation for my relationship is coming from me alone. I really care about this girl, and from some of my friends that I am talking to, apparently I am doing everything right. I treat her well, we used to go out all the time. But since her friend got married (who is 19 and has a 2 year old already) she has never been the same.

Like I said it just seems like she is more and more less interested everyday. She told me something like this might happen because of her past relationships and being hurt and whatnot. She also said that if this ever happens just to sit her down and talk about it. Well, since it has only REALLY been frying my brain for a day or 2 now, I havn't had a chance to talk to her about it.

What do you guys think? Any help would be greatly appriciated!

[Ahriman]

that sux man, theres no feeling worse than careing about someone more than they care about you, and knowing it. If its only been a couple of days, maybe shes on the rag or somthing... i dont know bro, just talk to her about it, watch her facial expressions and body language, most girls suck at hiding that kind of stuff. and go with your instincts, they are usually right, dont let her play any of those mind games girls are so good at(where they say one thing, but you know they mean somthing else), i hate that shit. just be like "listen, tell me exactly how you feel about us, and dont worry about hurting my feelings" and if it seems like she is dodging the real answer or playing games, call her out on it. You may not hear what you want to hear, but at least youll know the truth. I hope everything works out man, she seemed like a pretty cool girl the one time i met her.

[yeahididit2]

if you really like her tell her be honest you dont need to go out to do so cant you cook thats what scored points with my wife i can cook some steak boy hooowwweee my favorite....lol but watch a food channel if you cant cook well see if theres something you think is good write it down and do research online. nothing is better to a woman than a man who cooks and loves to. but make sure you do the dishes in front of her scores a ton-o-points... but the most important thing is to be honest and let her know how much you care during that diner and dont over do it like telling her you care 100times she will think you are a loon...

after diner go to a movie if she would like get a set date so you can show her you care. thats all i can say i did my wife was never going to or planed on being with me because i have a kid already she was scared... but hey i cook and do dishes...lol

[Freakazoid]

sounds pretty simple to me she wanted you to sit her down and talk to her about it if she did it. Sounds like she's doing it, sit down and talk with her about it.

Be blunt and truthful, and ask her to do the same. Chances are it's some stupid thing like she's worried that she won't be getting marrired or something like that. Just sit her down though and remind her that she asked you to talk to her about it, and be blunt, that's my 2 cents ;p

[redline13]

Thanks guys, I really appriciate it

Oh yeah, and by the way yeahididit2, I am full blooded sicilian. I was taught to cook by my grandmother who is from sicily. (I can make some bad ass Italian food)

Anything else guys?

[dacoolist]

Yeah what they all said+ look her in the eyes too, and listen to everything she has to say. Don't look away and make sure that she does the same. I read people all the time just by looking them in the eyes. Get good enough at it and you can ReAd ThEy'Re MiNdS MuAhHaHaHahAhAAAAAhh... im kidding about the last part damnit. Be funny to, gotta spice things up all the time. GL AND EVERYTHING! l8r

DA COOL

[redline13]

Originally Posted by Freakazoid

sounds pretty simple to me she wanted you to sit her down and talk to her about it if she did it. Sounds like she's doing it, sit down and talk with her about it.

Be blunt and truthful, and ask her to do the same. Chances are it's some stupid thing like she's worried that she won't be getting marrired or something like that. Just sit her down though and remind her that she asked you to talk to her about it, and be blunt, that's my 2 cents ;p

believe me man, I wish nothing more than for this to be that easy. But I have a feeling it is more complicated than that. I have had a nak for picking up on people's intentions. I just don't know what to do. After 2 years of not dating, it is depressing as hell to think that this may be my fault. I have been screwed over so many times I don't care to think of how many. I guess i'm just afraid that she will turn out like all the others.

One thing I will never understand. . .

Why do all the good girls date assholes, talk about how they hate getting fucked over, then. . .when they find a nice guy that is willing to do almost anything for them. . .they fuck over the same guy that they say that they have been wanting???????

[redline13]

I know there arn't many ladies here, but for those of you that are, I would love to hear what you all think too.

[Freakazoid]

Originally Posted by redline13

believe me man, I wish nothing more than for this to be that easy. But I have a feeling it is more complicated than that. I have had a nak for picking up on people's intentions. I just don't know what to do. After 2 years of not dating, it is depressing as hell to think that this may be my fault. I have been screwed over so many times I don't care to think of how many. I guess i'm just afraid that she will turn out like all the others.

One thing I will never understand. . .

Why do all the good girls date assholes, talk about how they hate getting fucked over, then. . .when they find a nice guy that is willing to do almost anything for them. . .they fuck over the same guy that they say that they have been wanting???????

because they don't know what they want, or rather won't admit what they want.

the best way to understand most girls is to understand the fact that at the core of them, they are no different than guys, they just put up a good facade saying otherwise. At our age most girls don't want a 'nice guy' that's lookin for a more steady relationship, same way at our age most guys don't want a girl who only wants a long term relationship. It's sad fact for the exceptions out there, but it IS a fact.

And if it turns out like all the others, then that's the way it was meant to be. Not your fault, just not the girl for you. Wait it out man, you'll find the right one in time. And if you say it's easier said than done, trust me I understand more than anyone out there:P If it stays like that and you're unable to rise passion out of her, then give up on it and move on. Don't try to push something that will not happen.

[Freakazoid]

Originally Posted by redline13

I know there arn't many ladies here, but for those of you that are, I would love to hear what you all think too.

careful asking girls for opinions in matters like these, unless they are truly in touch with what THEY want, they can make you more confused than you already are.... the facade has been so inground into them, that's the reason why guys get so confused with them so often. Most guys believe the facade.