one liners

[superbird]

1. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a minute, but set him on fire, and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.
2. The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
3. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
4. Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
5. It's your god. They're your rules. *You* go to hell.
6. War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
7. Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
8. If pro is opposite of con, then what is the opposite of progress?
9. If you think things can't get worse it's probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
10. I once prayed to god for a bike, but quickly found out he didnt work that way...so I stole a bike and prayed for his forgiveness
11. A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
12. You can't be late until you show up.
13. Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
14. Knowledge is realizing that the street is one-way, wisdom is looking both directions anyway
15. Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
16. My god carries a hammer. Your god died nailed to a tree. Any questions?
17. A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
18. The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources
19. Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
20. books have knowledge, knowledge is power, power corrupts, corruption is a crime, and crime doesn't pay..so if you keep reading, you'll go broke

[mrphoto103]

Superbird is a moron
Dont eat yellow snow
Dont pee in to the wind


btw, I know you copied and pasted that from somewhere becuase everything was spelled correctly

[Keyser Soze]

man who go to bed with itchy ass wake up with smelly finger.

[importdeporter]

man who walk through narrow door sideways going to bangkok

[SR-1 ION]

pound your conk as often as you can
buy your books with cash

[CarNut]

I'd like to help you out, but I don't know which door you came in.

[danigurl1978]

If you shake it more than tiwce, you're playing with it.

[superbird]

Originally Posted by danigurl1978

If you shake it more than tiwce, you're playing with it.

i guess i play with it alot

[danigurl1978]

Originally Posted by superbird

i guess i play with it alot

I guess you do.

[redline13]

Boy, thats funnier than a legless ethiopian watching a donut roll down a hill. . .which is like wiping before you poop. . .it just doesn't make any sense.