a little something i wrote when i went thru chemo the first time

[nightmistwalker]

The bumpy road




it all started months ago when a demon crossed my path of life and decided to take hold. It started first by tormenting me a few days a month .it made me not feel like myself. It dragged me down and made me rest. I had to go see specialist to find this demon it hid so well. It made me go thru painful medical procedures to find it. It caused me to change my way of life. I was the first of my family to be lucky enough to run into this demon. It had never showed its ugly head with anyone else in the history of my family line. I watched as friends shied away from me from lack of words to say. I tried but failed to keep what i had collected in thirty years of hard work. I watched as my spouse of life cried when she did not think i knew. This demon has caused pain way beyond what i have previously experienced. The demon inside is tearing down a soul as you watch your own life disappear before your own eyes. I tried to fight back but without help it was useless. I gathered a team of experts on this demon but it took them a few months just to locate it. It was listed as a rare occurrence one that does not happen very often. I went threw a lot of testing and blood withdrawals. I had won most of the battles against this demon week to week. Finally it was time to face this demon and fight it head on. They locked me away in a room for 7 days and poured poison threw me like it was water. The toxic liquid burned threw me as i started a war with this demon. It ran away from the toxic waste not wanting to face it. Then the last night of the battle it made a final stand against me and knocked me to my knees. Sitting on me i asked this demon to end this battle for me for i had no more fight left to give. For a few minutes i thought it had. I awoke to find i was still laying in this world and the demon had retreated or so they thought. One day later it returned for another frame of war within me. The seven day stay had now turned into ten days straight of battles. I cried out for my savior for his help to give me the strength to push this demon back to where ever it came from. The demon retreated once again and has not brought the fight back to me. So here we stand the two of us at this crossroads looking across at each other just waiting for one or the other to take the first shot. Nervousness always looming with the knowledge that out of the blue it strikes with no fear of punishment with its own name on it. So we wait and try to carry on our mere existence. To all my brothers and sisters that carry the fight on with these demons my heart and soul goes out to you. Stay the righteous fight and never surrender even if it is a loosing cause. Never let this demon see that it has defeated you even when it takes your last breath from your body. Remember it may lay claim to your body but it can never have your spirit.


Nightmistwalker

[hawlyns711]

very deep man, it was a good read.

[KruxRedline]

Right on man. I really hope you beat this shit. There's a shortage of awesome human beings left. If there is a supreme being he's got a fucked idea giving good people illnesses while crackheads and criminals live on forever.

[stage3ion]

wish you the best for the hardship you are going through... cancer is common in my family and my aunt died years ago from a brain tumor... she retired from aa and 2 weeks after she retired she woke up with a really bad headache and then they diagnosed her... they gave her 2 years to live but she only made it through 6 months and now we fear my grandmother might have cancer and now we wait day to day for the test results... it really sucks and i know what you and your family are going through... best of luck like i said and hopefully you pull on top of this demon

[nightmistwalker]

i have been playing around with writing things for a couple years now and actually i am in the process of writing a sci -fi vampire type of book. gives me something to do when i am down and not feeling all that good.thank god for spell and grammar checker though..lol

[jmuffe01]

glad to see your still hanging in there man give me a call sometime

[nightmistwalker]

pm me your number bud and ill give ya a shout tommorrow

[Margaritaville]

Wow man I don't have much to say really but keep fighting. You're a true inspiration!

[Benfica7]

Keep on fighting man, we are here for support...And they say that it is good to get your thoughts on paper when you're facing rough times.

[indredsnake99]

that is very deep keep fighting