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Old 01-21-2006, 05:25 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Talking Driving Tips for our 2006 Super Bowl Guests in Detroit.

Driving Tips for our 2006 Super Bowl Guests:

1. First, you must learn to pronounce the city name.
It's Di-troit, NOT DEE-troit. If you pronounce it
DEE-Troit then we will assume you are from Toledo and
here for the country Music hoe-down.

2. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere.
Detroit has its own version of traffic rules... Hold
on and pray!

3. The morning rush hour is from 6:00am to 10:00am.
The evening rush hour is from 3:00pm to 7:00pm.
Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning. Weekends
are open game.

4. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be
rear-ended, cussed out and possibly shot. If you're
first off the starting line when the light turns
green, count to five before going. This will avoid
getting in the way of cross-traffic who just ran their
yellow light to keep from getting shot.

5. Schoenherr can ONLY be properly pronounced by a
native of the Detroit metro area. That goes for Gratiot too.

6. Construction and renovation on I-94, I-96, I-75,
I-275, I-375, The Lodge and The Southfield Freeways
are a way of life. Just deal with it.

7. If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is
probably a factory defect or they are "out-of-towners."

8. All old men with white hair wearing a hat have total right-of-way.

9. The minimum acceptable speed on I-696 is 85
regardless of the posted speeds. Anything less is
considered downright SISSY. Oh, and don't even think
of allowing more than one car length between cars!

10. That attractive wrought iron on the windows and
doors in Detroit is NOT ornamental. DO NOT get out of
your car.

11. Never stare at the driver of the car with the
bumper sticker that reads "Keep honking, I'm reloading."

12. If you are in the left lane, and only going 70 in
a 60 mph zone, people are not waving 'because they are
so friendly in Detroit'. I would suggest you duck.

13. I-275/I-696 is our daily version of NASCAR.

14. It's not M-10, it's "the Lodge".

15. That's not a lake, it's a pothole.

16. If someone tells you it's on Outer Drive, you
better hope you have a map.

17. The left turn is simple: If you want to turn left,
go a 1/4 of a mile past your turn, get to the left,
then make a left, then make a right. NOW you have
gone left.

ENJOY YOUR STAY, BUT AVOID EYE-CONTACT WITH THE LOCALS
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Old 01-21-2006, 07:57 PM   #2 (permalink)
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LOL thats funny man but so true! Driving in Detroit sucks, its an urban war-zone LOL
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Old 01-21-2006, 08:03 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I'm sure the other Detroit guys will sound off to this one. There is not a single untrue statement in that list. And we could probably come up with more.

The city's unofficial slogan.
Detroit: Where the Weak are Killed and Eaten!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 01-22-2006, 01:45 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dipolley
1. First, you must learn to pronounce the city name.
It's Di-troit, NOT DEE-troit. If you pronounce it
DEE-Troit then we will assume you are from Toledo and
here for the country Music hoe-down.
I guess all Pistons fans are from Toledo? Or the announcer at least, whenever we cause a turnover or end up with the ball, the announcer always says "DEEEEEETROIT BASKETBALLLL." Did I just prove this one wrong?
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Old 02-02-2006, 10:54 AM   #5 (permalink)
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I will take all of these things to heart on my drive up Saturday to DI-TROIT. I don't think I will have a problem because we have some of these same issues in the Burgh.
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Old 02-02-2006, 11:04 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brk_05
I will take all of these things to heart on my drive up Saturday to DI-TROIT. I don't think I will have a problem because we have some of these same issues in the Burgh.

no shit!? you are going to the game? or just going to get close to it
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Old 02-02-2006, 11:05 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ptparker
no shit!? you are going to the game? or just going to get close to it

he's just tailgating, i already had that discussion with him
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Old 02-02-2006, 11:08 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Freakazoid
he's just tailgating, i already had that discussion with him
HAHAHA... that is funny how vauge he was about it, i will be heading up 'there'
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Old 02-02-2006, 12:35 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Ya, I wish I could go to the game. I'm just going for the, ummm, atmosphere we will call it.
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Old 02-02-2006, 01:14 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by brk_05
Ya, I wish I could go to the game. I'm just going for the, ummm, atmosphere we will call it.
I have a feeling you wont be the only Steelers fan up there
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